Basically, I know artists are right-brained. I only wish some of them were not quite so unable to shift gears to the left.
Well, no. What I truly wish is that artists would be conscious of others in the world.
Don't know if you've experienced it or not, but most of the artists I know are unable to keep to a timetable. They're always late, they're always making people wait upon them to show up, and they're always asking other artists/other people/galleries/contests/projects to hold off enforcing their due dates, because they cannot seem to MAKE the due dates. Ever.
This is not all my artistic friends, but it encompasses many of them. In some of their cases, that "never on time/never able to schedule properly" is really more a symptom of passive-aggressive issues on top of narcissism, which is honestly horrible. They're so grandiously self-important that anyone else's time/effort/etc. is nothing compared to the clusterfuck they expect everyone else to wait upon; i.e.: THEM. For this sub-circle of Hell, I have no patience. It's presumptive and impolite to importune people like that.
I used to put up with it more kindly, but with blatant repeat offenders, I have come to the point where I will tell them what they're doing to others and let them know that if they want my attendance, they'll be on time to whatever time they have committed to arriving.
That sounds mean, but when everyone else would like to actually be able to order and eat dinner before we all try to make a specific movie showing together, that one narcissistic person can ruin everyone's evening by showing up 'for dinner' thirty minutes after the movie has started.
However, there is another subset of the late-show-ers who are basically incapable of keeping time. They THINK they are; they even have watches and clocks everywhere. But their inner sense of time is skewed and "their" version of, say, "fifteen minutes" is reality's version of closer to something else, like forty-five minutes, for example. With this group, I tend to watch and learn what their version of "fifteen minutes" is, and then I calculate appropriately. For the one guy who cannot show up before 45 minutes despite what he says, I pack on the extra time in my initial "Let's get together at..." proposal. When he says he'll be somewhere in thirty minutes, I know it will be closer to an hour and a half. People like this (when you know the time conversions) are fairly easy to work with, because you know the reality to what they are saying. Rather like Fahrenheit versus Celsius.
Time is a reality; most artists do not appear to grasp that.
Sadly, the worst thing I can relate about creative people is, that while we all attempt to maintain a positive attitude about our own work, that positive encouragement is not always aimed at fellow artists. Again, the narcissists among us do not really CARE about the rest of their 'fellow artists', so they equally do not care if they can ruin your motivations or happen to accidentally say they like something you've done. It's All About Them, so unless they're mired in a creative block/depressive state, they likely will not notice what anyone else is doing artistically, anyway. But beware them when they ARE blocked or depressed, because they will often sabotage their creative friends--now, if this is purposeful and jealous, or unconscious criticism, or just a reflection of their inner state, it's hard to tell.
One of my artistic friends that suffers from unrelenting uncreativity and depression will insist they want to be involved in ANYTHING the rest of us do, whether it's going to art shows and galleries, going out plein air painting, or working on a project together, etc....but this person will not only sabotage their own efforts, they'll sabotage YOURS, too. They won't show up on time--or perhaps at all. But they'll have made certain they are the transportation. They won't tell you they're not going to show up, they simply dismiss any need to inform you at all. (This person sabotages all kinds of events to the point where I will not plan on going ANYWHERE with this person if there's any sort of start/end time, such as a movie schedule, or an art show that only goes for two hours, etc. If something is open-ended; sure. If not, I know they will do their best to fuck me and/or anyone else involved.) You can bet this person never has anything positive to say about anything, but that's from general 'darkness' flooding their point of view, not out of nastiness. The whole problem is, despite claiming vociferously that they are "an artist" and want to "be involved" in things, the truth is they haven't done anything creative since about 1990. That's twenty-two years ago.
I have another friend that I have to admit, I have to avoid them COMPLEATLY. Give this person five minutes and they'll pour your ears so full of darkness, moaning, and misery that you feel covered in blackness. You find yourself unable to keep trying to encourage this person, because they will actively beat down anything you say, because they truly do not believe anything will EVER get better. EVER. You end up speechless and staring while the litany of sour misery goes on-and-on-and-on-and-on-and-on. I've admittedly never seen anyone quite like this person. I send the occasional email, I dodge invitations to spend physical time together, and I desperately run away at art shows when I see this person coming. I hate to admit I'm that poor of a friend to this one, but I've TRIED. After five years of doing all I can to try to include this one in fun things and to try to encourage them, I've given up. I believe most of the other artists in this particular group of friends have also given up, which cannot help this friend of ours. "Debbie Downer" doesn't even come CLOSE to the level of "OMG~! Run away!" when you see this person approaching.
While I wish I had more creative friends who were willing to make the effort to try to do things together more often, I find I have to protect my own energy at times. I have to make a point of protecting my creativity from being leeched away.
I am often the bouncing 'Tigger' in a group, but even I can be worn down and finally will withdraw--I'm thinking of the one artists' group where I arranged gallery shows and kept trying to plan outings and encouraging creative 'things' for us all to do. But there were always several members of the group who would insist they needed everyone's attention, they would show up to gallery hangings with UNFRAMED work, expecting me/us to FRAME their pieces AND hang them for them, and all they would do is moan. And criticise everyone else's work. I finally had to disband the group; I couldn't take it anymore.
We are our own worst enemies, artists.
Grey
Well, no. What I truly wish is that artists would be conscious of others in the world.
Don't know if you've experienced it or not, but most of the artists I know are unable to keep to a timetable. They're always late, they're always making people wait upon them to show up, and they're always asking other artists/other people/galleries/contests/projects to hold off enforcing their due dates, because they cannot seem to MAKE the due dates. Ever.
This is not all my artistic friends, but it encompasses many of them. In some of their cases, that "never on time/never able to schedule properly" is really more a symptom of passive-aggressive issues on top of narcissism, which is honestly horrible. They're so grandiously self-important that anyone else's time/effort/etc. is nothing compared to the clusterfuck they expect everyone else to wait upon; i.e.: THEM. For this sub-circle of Hell, I have no patience. It's presumptive and impolite to importune people like that.
I used to put up with it more kindly, but with blatant repeat offenders, I have come to the point where I will tell them what they're doing to others and let them know that if they want my attendance, they'll be on time to whatever time they have committed to arriving.
That sounds mean, but when everyone else would like to actually be able to order and eat dinner before we all try to make a specific movie showing together, that one narcissistic person can ruin everyone's evening by showing up 'for dinner' thirty minutes after the movie has started.
However, there is another subset of the late-show-ers who are basically incapable of keeping time. They THINK they are; they even have watches and clocks everywhere. But their inner sense of time is skewed and "their" version of, say, "fifteen minutes" is reality's version of closer to something else, like forty-five minutes, for example. With this group, I tend to watch and learn what their version of "fifteen minutes" is, and then I calculate appropriately. For the one guy who cannot show up before 45 minutes despite what he says, I pack on the extra time in my initial "Let's get together at..." proposal. When he says he'll be somewhere in thirty minutes, I know it will be closer to an hour and a half. People like this (when you know the time conversions) are fairly easy to work with, because you know the reality to what they are saying. Rather like Fahrenheit versus Celsius.
Time is a reality; most artists do not appear to grasp that.
Sadly, the worst thing I can relate about creative people is, that while we all attempt to maintain a positive attitude about our own work, that positive encouragement is not always aimed at fellow artists. Again, the narcissists among us do not really CARE about the rest of their 'fellow artists', so they equally do not care if they can ruin your motivations or happen to accidentally say they like something you've done. It's All About Them, so unless they're mired in a creative block/depressive state, they likely will not notice what anyone else is doing artistically, anyway. But beware them when they ARE blocked or depressed, because they will often sabotage their creative friends--now, if this is purposeful and jealous, or unconscious criticism, or just a reflection of their inner state, it's hard to tell.
One of my artistic friends that suffers from unrelenting uncreativity and depression will insist they want to be involved in ANYTHING the rest of us do, whether it's going to art shows and galleries, going out plein air painting, or working on a project together, etc....but this person will not only sabotage their own efforts, they'll sabotage YOURS, too. They won't show up on time--or perhaps at all. But they'll have made certain they are the transportation. They won't tell you they're not going to show up, they simply dismiss any need to inform you at all. (This person sabotages all kinds of events to the point where I will not plan on going ANYWHERE with this person if there's any sort of start/end time, such as a movie schedule, or an art show that only goes for two hours, etc. If something is open-ended; sure. If not, I know they will do their best to fuck me and/or anyone else involved.) You can bet this person never has anything positive to say about anything, but that's from general 'darkness' flooding their point of view, not out of nastiness. The whole problem is, despite claiming vociferously that they are "an artist" and want to "be involved" in things, the truth is they haven't done anything creative since about 1990. That's twenty-two years ago.
I have another friend that I have to admit, I have to avoid them COMPLEATLY. Give this person five minutes and they'll pour your ears so full of darkness, moaning, and misery that you feel covered in blackness. You find yourself unable to keep trying to encourage this person, because they will actively beat down anything you say, because they truly do not believe anything will EVER get better. EVER. You end up speechless and staring while the litany of sour misery goes on-and-on-and-on-and-on-and-on. I've admittedly never seen anyone quite like this person. I send the occasional email, I dodge invitations to spend physical time together, and I desperately run away at art shows when I see this person coming. I hate to admit I'm that poor of a friend to this one, but I've TRIED. After five years of doing all I can to try to include this one in fun things and to try to encourage them, I've given up. I believe most of the other artists in this particular group of friends have also given up, which cannot help this friend of ours. "Debbie Downer" doesn't even come CLOSE to the level of "OMG~! Run away!" when you see this person approaching.
While I wish I had more creative friends who were willing to make the effort to try to do things together more often, I find I have to protect my own energy at times. I have to make a point of protecting my creativity from being leeched away.
I am often the bouncing 'Tigger' in a group, but even I can be worn down and finally will withdraw--I'm thinking of the one artists' group where I arranged gallery shows and kept trying to plan outings and encouraging creative 'things' for us all to do. But there were always several members of the group who would insist they needed everyone's attention, they would show up to gallery hangings with UNFRAMED work, expecting me/us to FRAME their pieces AND hang them for them, and all they would do is moan. And criticise everyone else's work. I finally had to disband the group; I couldn't take it anymore.
We are our own worst enemies, artists.
Grey
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